Getting to Know Me?

You ever have someone tell you "I KNOW YOU"? I just LOVE when people say that to me! (sarcasm emphasized!) There are VERY few people who really know me...but I am going to clear up a few "myths" about me.

1. I may seem hardcore on the outside, but I DO get hurt feelings!--especially when I am lied to. I hate lying.
2. I would rather you risk hurting my feelings by telling me something painful, than to flatter me with words. (most people want you to tell them something looks good, but me-i would rather just know the truth)
3. I don't trust people before I trust them.
4. I was made fun of almost my entire life; it has scared me deep to my core. -that is probably one of the biggest reasons I am so guarded.
5. When you don't accept my kids, I take it personally.
6. When I ask for help, it's because I REALLY need help! People have said, "Oh she is strong, she can handle it" --Strong people still need help!
7. I am not an idiot. I do research things.
8. Just because I question authority, doesn't make me a rebellious person....it makes me smart for not just following blindly behind someone.
9. Yes, I do think you are "out to get me"....that is because this world is "every man for himself". People want what is best for themselves above all. That is what I believe to be true of people.
10. I believe people take advantage of me, and I allow it for a season. When that season ends, I am done.
11. If you keep secrets from me about things that are hurtful to me and/ or my family and I find out, I will never trust you again-no matter how hard you try. It is not the same anymore, no matter what you believe to be true. I have been burned badly.
12. I believe that the Love of God is more important than the laws of God being thrust onto a person. The reason: Once someone fully understands what the LOVE of God is, they will want to learn and  follow the laws of God. That is why I don't feel the need to put sin on levels and think one person is so much worse than another because they have done XXXX sin. I don't like being around people who "judge" others for such things. Your haughtiness is the same as their atheism, homosexuality, whoredom, or murder, or abortion for that matter! actually, i think i find your haughtiness more repulsive-because you should Know better!
13. Tell me I can't do something, and I will find a way to do it...........this is my attitude to alot of things, but not just for the sake of RULE BREAKING. I am bigger than that!
14. If I am true to myself and you don't like me, that is perfectly fine. Sometimes I don't like you either.
15. I don't play house or pretend life- if you feel the need to do that, I would rather we don't cross paths again. People like that are toxic.
16. I realize that my "friend pool" is limited because I am who I am. It doesn't bother me if you and I are not friends....it does bother me if you act like you are my friend just when it is convenient for you.

Well, there you go. I am sure this will stir  the pot.....that was not the point. Do you get it yet?

Letter from Concerned Mom

I am linking this post from my friend, Dusty's, blog. She could not have said this better! Thanks Dusty! I really think you need to send that letter--or make it go viral. You know we could animate it and make it into a YouTube ad for companies! More parents need to be motivated and positively pressured to keep their girls modest! Its a shame what girls feel the need to wear or become in order to gain what they perceive as respect. The reality is, noone is respecting them; they just lust them!

http://reachtothemoonandback.blogspot.com/2010/05/open-letter-to-manufacturers-of-little.html

~Controversial topic for Christian parents~

I have really been thinking about this topic lately. All the up roaring of Christians with the White House not having the yearly "Day of Prayer" ceremony has really got me thinking. I can't say that I am upset that our President has decided to do this. It really doesn't surprise me, because I can only expect unbelievers to do unbelieving things. I also think its kinda GOOD that Obama is not praying to God just as a show to do it because it is expected of him as President. If it is not his heartfelt conviction to do so, than it may be better that he does not just put on some act for us Americans.

I hear so many Christians talking about how its just "not the best decision" that we send our kids to public school. Though i respect their opinion and convictions for their children-really i would love to hear them say-"I pray that God gives your children opportunity and the will to do what is right in HIS sight and be a salt for Him." (I guess that would sound to them they are condoning my bad choice.) But ok let's get past my hard feelings about stupid ignorant comments and get to the point of my post....

Separation of church and state was established to keep government out of church--please correct me if my History is wrong there-I have never been a history buff. So if that is the case-then WHY are Christian parents SO up roared about schools not allowing (in some states and areas) school-wide prayer or Bible teaching? I have to admit, I am GLAD that the teachers do not do it. Though I think its great if someone other than the parent is helping a child understand the Bible, I cannot say that I have been happy with even some of the "Biblical things" my own children have been filled with through church programs. Every Christian has his own take on certain things in the Bible. I am not referring to BLACK AND WHITE sin issues, but more of Christian liberty issues-such as music or movie watching or owning a computer or participating in secular sports programs. These things in and of themselves are not sin--certainly they can be abused and turn to sin. I guess what i am trying to find out is that parents responsibility is given to parents to raise their children in the glory and admonition of the Lord-not the schools, teachers or churches. (I AM NOT SAYING THAT YOU SHOULD NOT ALLOW OTHERS TO TEACH THE BIBLE TO YOUR CHILD-what i am saying is we are gonna be responsible for what is taught to them-even when it relates to the Bible. hence, a lot of pro-homeschoolers)

Let's turn the tables a bit though. Christian parents would be so ecstatic if they found out that starting on May 1st, 2010 all public school systems are required to have morning prayer and a Bible devotion time. Am I wrong? wouldn't you be glad they are enforcing something like that? But what if they started saying that in addition to that so there will also be prayer rugs handed out to ALL students and at certain times they are made to pray towards Mecca. Or Rosary beads will be given as children are led in prayer by the teacher. I can't help but say that this would certainly ALARM me as a Christian parent. and I am sure that the Bible teaching would alarm those in these other religions. Now we KNOW That the God we pray to, is the ONE TRUE GOD. But these people in other false religions do not know that they serve a false god. If they did they would stop serving it. The Holy Spirit has not spoken to these individuals yet, or He has and they have not responded. Whatever the case, I am glad that the public school is not teaching any kind of religion to my children. I know what they are taught and can correct or reinforce what they have learned and when it comes to Bible matters, it is left to us THE PARENTS. On these reasons I can totally see why a lot of Christians choose to home school. If you can do it well and your children handle it well-then kudos to you. And I pray that they excel, just as I pray that my children excel in their studies. Just when it comes to mine, I pray everyday that they choose to be a righteous testimony for the Lord's sake in their classrooms. I know they will mess up and I know that I too will fail as a parent in areas. Without God's help, strength and love we all are nothing anyway. Can Christian's not support one another and leave the schools and governments out of it?
So what do you think?

Someone PLEASE enlighten me!

ok, so i keep seeing all these people who have their kids dressed to the T and have spent bookoo dollars on outfits that will seriously fit their little ones for all of 3 months! What baby was born knowing if thier clothes are from Gymboree, Children's Place, Gap, "RANDOM BOUTIQUE THAT OVER CHARGES" or WALMART or Target, or the THRIFT store? (and i am NOT saying having clothese that come from these stores is wrong!) ok, spend the money whatever-to me its just not that important. What really boggles my mind though are the moms who spend like $10+ on a shirt that is for a very specific holiday-such as St. Patty's day, Valentines Day or the like, but don't let their kids wear it in public any other day. WHAT? Can someone enlighten me as to what you are trying to teach your child? I KNOW i am not the most fashion conscious mother-i mean Wednesday nights my younger kids go to church in PJs; my children have been known to leave the house with a stain on their shirt-and yes, Candice does her own hair. But I can't help but wonder WHY does looking SO PERFECT have to be in the top priority for such young kids? They are born innately self-centered. The Bible teaches us to be CHRIST centered. How is being the perfect fashionista teaching them that appearances are not the top priority? At 4 years old, Candice is already being scolded for being int he mirror too much-she literally fixes her hair or "pretend make-up" like 6x a day! Don't get me wrong, i think a person-young or old-should look in the mirror and fix what needs fixing, but our society has REALLY impacted how we dress our kids and what we teach them is important, whether or not you stand there and say "THIS IS IMPORTANT TO LOOK PERFECT" that is what you are saying! I really think Christian moms need to get their priorities in order with this one.
*So go ahead, enlighten me, tell me how its NOT teaching them that appearances are the priority.* (again, i am sure i will be criticized, i welcome your criticisms :)

An update continues...

Well, Candice is turning into She-Devil...LOL-Not really. We are just SO different its not even funny! I find it hard to find commonality with her. She is SO girly and I am so NOT girly. The best things we love to do together are drink coffee (yes i let her have it sometimes-no worse than soda or those gummy snack every other mother loads into their kid!), tell Bible stories or ask "so do you think...." questions to each other. (i might add that its very insightful when asking these types of questions to your child as to where they are emotionally and mentally!) candice also likes to kick my butt in Wii bowling! She laughs at me that i am not very good at it, she tries to give me pointers too-but i tell her "go ahead and laugh honey, then we will go REAL bowling and see who is laughing!" Its fun!

The BEST thing about her right now is her interest in the Bible. She prayed to receive Christ as Savior just before Christmas this past year. It was amazing to see her face light up when she would tell others that she prayed to ask Jesus in her heart! She reassures us that God will NEVER leave her because "HE PROMISED! and He doesn't break a promise, NO!" She is a whip! She LOVES church and AWANA and all that comes with it! She loves people! She does have a social issue...I call it "Margaret from Dennis the Menace Syndrome"--also known as pure selfishness. (we are watching "the rod of correction drive it far from her!"-we are seeing improvement slowly, but surely!) candice is also the little mommy here...still. this has not changed! Its great in some aspects because she helped potty train Cameron! :D She also still loves to clean-anything but her room! ;) She may go to preschool next year. I have not decided completely yet-though i think it would do her good with her "syndrome"....she knows her letters, numbers, shapes, colors, small words, phonics and many other pre-K things, the social dynamic is my biggest concern. Clayton and Candice also just started Swimming Lessons and are enjoying it!

Cameron is my little TURKEY! She wants to make everyone laugh, and she likes to cuddle too! She is a heart breaker! she is a stubborn one, that's for sure--but she is learning QUICKLY that she will not get away with it! She is potty trained and can put her panties on by herself. She also knows how to get undressed and and put her clothes in the washer. She also is so proud of herself when she clears her plate after dinner! It is her job to put the silverware away when the dishwasher stops--she is not the best sorter yet, but she is getting there! (I think it is fun for her because she gets to stand on the chair!) She is saying 3-4 word sentences and LOVES to play baby dolls. She also loves the swing and slides! Her favorite song is "This Little Light of Mine"! She can quote Ephesians 6:1a and frequently reminds her brother "Bobby, you bey Mommy!" (She nicknamed everyone: Clayton is Bobby, Candice is DeeDee, and Corbett is Corby...these are inside family names, so don't go trying to use them ;)

Then there is Corbett who is just trying to survive in the madness! He is a BIG guy with a BIGGER smile! He is SO happy-generally! We have been so blessed with him! He sports a mohawk--AND NO I WILL NOT PUT A BOW IN IT, thanks for all the suggestions people! He melts me...i think sons do that to their mother intentionally so when they grow up and act like an idiot one day, the mom backs them up anyway! LOL! He is trying to crawl, but hasn't quite got it yet-but he is a determined fella (must run in the family!)

Jacob is a whole other story-that unfortunately will remain a mystery to all of you! Someday when he sees you in person he can enlighten you on the road he has been able to travel. The Lord has been good to us, that is all i can say! Right now Jacob's favorite verse says "The horse is prepared against the day of battle: but safety is of the Lord." Proverbs 21:31--The Lord has given him safety so far! All in all though, he is doing well. I did throw him a surprise 30th birthday party-that was fun and completely a surprise to him! I really thought he had suspected it, but he said he had NO idea! YAY!

More posts to come......as soon as I get a few things done! ;)

Bit of an update...

So much is going on in our lives right now, I feel like I hardly have time to think-let alone write a blog about it! I feel like I am trying to find myself all over again. Trying to evaluate certain things, put other things into the right perspective and make better decisions for my spiritual walk. December was the last time I posted, but I have MANY things that I woudl just love to sit and write about. I find myself wanting SO BADLY to write about what is going on in my heart, BUT I have done that before and I have gotten remarks from people that just cut me to the core-so I pull away. I am torn. I want to write about it, but putting yourself out there like that can be painful....hmmm.

Currently, I am reading a book called "Grown Up Girlfriends". How eyeopening--sometimes in good ways, sometimes not so much!! I am learning that sometimes who I thought was/is a good friend of mine, truly is not...and some that I have kept at an arms length, really I should reel in. Its difficult. Women NEED connections and friends. At this point in my life, it saddens me that so many ladies in my age bracket still are so stuck in High School mentality when it comes to friends. I will admit that I have been judgemental to some and probably laid my opinions out there a little too prematurely-or in a way that jumped their boundary. If I did this to you, I am sorry. I am working on being a better friend and finding people who are friends--the kind Jesus wants us to be. The hardest part for me right now is that my whole life, my friends-my true to heart friends-came from my church family. At this point in my life that is not so. I have made friends at church, don't get me wrong- i think there are some people that do FRIEND type things for me from there-but when I REALLY truly evaluate where things really are, I can find 3. This is not a BAD thing per se, but it is a little disheartening, considering my thoughts and reality do not match up. My best of friends at the moment-friends that edify me, have fun, cry/laugh with me, let me help them, have common interests, those with whom I can be absolute with, get advice from, and know they are praying for me and are there for me--do not come from church family. I have to get rid of the thinking that "church people" are looking at me and thinking I don't WANT to be their friend or be involved in things--its OK-whatever they think. Because I know and God knows what is going on with me--and that is what matters right now. *So there is a TINY peek into what is happening with me*

the rest of my family: Well, Clayton is doing AWESOME in school. he made Scholar of the Month for February. He writes stories and LOVES writing and reading! He is reading chapter books quickly and comprehending the story. He is reading at level L, and only needs to be at level H to leave 1st grade. i am proud of him! he is also showing signs of great character lately! He is definitely maturing! A few weeks ago some boys at school were making fun of a girl who is on the chubby side. They were telling her she was fat. Clayton told her to tell the teacher. She didn't want to and didn't want Clayton to tell the teacher. So Clayton said ok-and he walked around the track with her when noone else would. He told her "Its ok, I don't think you are fat!" :) I think he made her feel better-she gave him a HUGE valentine! :) Also, I am sure I have mentioned before about Clayton's school being a diamond in the rough. Well lately Clayton has been asking to pray at lunch and different activities. the teacher allows him to and anyone who wants to can pray with him. This past week, he prayed for their field trip adn lunch-there are about 4 other kids that consistantly pray with him. There are 3 that he is burdened for-since they don't want to pray. He is praying FOR them now too! God is GOOD! He also has started baseball. He is VERY athletic and does very well! We can't wait to watch him play! By the way, Clayton has also grown about 3-4 inches since school started this year! He wears a size 2 shoes, and size 8 clothes--where has my baby gone?!

*ok, so i have to pause here and come back--mothering duties call...more on the rest of the family soon!

Miss Prissy Panties!

I am SO happy that Cameron is now potty trained! I could have said this a couple weeks ago, but i wanted ot wait til it was not me taking her to the bathroom-but her telling me "POTTY, MOMMY" We are there! The other morning was another HUGE break through-she woke up at 0545 and knocked on our bedroom door. I opened the door and she looked up at me and said "mommy, potty poop" and she turned to walk to the bathroom. She woke up to tell me she needed to go!? WOW!! I really couldn't be happier...we are 1 giant step closer to being a diaper free house!

Rice and Beans #3

Ok, last night of Rice and Beans.....EVERYONE cleaned plate! but wait, thats not the best part...i even got THANK YOU's without being prompted! and wait, there's more.....On Thanksgiving, my kids (namely Clayton) couldn't finish his food because he was TOO FULL! WHAT?! i thought the day would never come!.....i think his stomach shrunk from the previous days of eating small portions! More to come on Thanksgiving.....

we will DEFINITELY be doing this again! Now to add up my savings and make my donation to the Food Pantry!

Rice and Bean Night #2

Well, as you can imagine, little bellies were growling before dinner! I forewarned the children of the no pie rule if the dinner bowls were not emptied into their bellies! I have to add the beans and rice were better tasting on the second day as opposed to the first. The flavors had all melted together and it was good!

Clayton ate all of his supper with no complaints! It took him about 20 minutes to eat his bowl full, but he was very proud of himself when he was finished knowing he could eat pie!
Candice ate every last bit of her bowl full also. Again, no complaints from her. She was also excited and reassured us that she woud lbe eating pie!
Cameron sat for 40 minutes with a mouth full of food. She was holding it in her mouth so long it was digesting in her mouth. ewe! We finally got her to swallow the mouthful--i won't release my tactics to you-but rest assured, it IS in her belly...well by now, the potty! :) Jacob slipped up and gave her a bite of pie *tisk-tisk*!

I am not sure how tonight will go. There have already been tears shed that Rice and Beans is on the menu yet again! BUT we are not hungry, so be ye thankful! [I do feel (the slightest bit of) bad since it is Candice's birthday today, and we are not having anything she would choose, so we agreed to have her birthday dinner on Friday instead-so she can pick what we have for supper!]

Rice and Bean Night #1

Well, the first night of beans and rice went better than expected. First, the meal itself was good! Its just a bag of white beans, some onions, spices, bacon and water. boil and simmer for several hours til thickened.

There were some complaints as always, and some request for something different for dinner. But we explained what he purpose of this project was, and it was well received. The children are starting to understand that others do not have the food we are blessed with. In fact, i am thinking of driving them by a few house that i guarantee are some that do not have much more than beans and rice. But there were no tears about supper.

Candice ate most of hers without complaining. Clayton asked for something different and said he didn't really like it. Took about 4 bites and decided he did not want to eat if that was the option. He didn't ask for anything else or complain about being hungry. Cameron ate 1 bite and held it in her mouth for about 20 minutes. We told her she had to swallow it if she wanted to be excused from the table. She swallowed and pushed her bowl away.

Tonight-its left over night. I am not making new beans and rice. We will eat what we didn't eat last night. And tonight is Pie Night at church. Whoever doesn't eat their dinner doesn't get pie-so i am hoping with the incentive there will be cleaner bowls.....we will see!

Meanest Parents on the Block!

Well, we have done it! we are SO mean! and someday our kids will thank us for it! Jacob and I have decided to take the challenge to only eat Rice and Beans for supper til Thanksgiving. Mind you our children are not bean lovers. They tolerate some of them, and there is one child who thinks gagging will make the rules of eating somehow change...He has not been so fortunate and AMAZINGLY he has not thrown up or withered away as he so thought! LOL!
Our endeavor will only really be a half plunge into the challenge, since the REAL challenge i heard about was to eat the rice and beans for EVeRY meal til Thanksgiving, but we decided to start slow! :)
Whats the point of this, you ask? well the point is to learn a new level of thankfulness. There are ALOT of people who live on beans and rice daily...probably not 3x a day either. We would be fortunate to have that much in comparison. Imagine how much better our turkey dinner will taste after this week! I am excited to see what we all take from this...and learn to give back!